


Aizawa-sensei, Tasukete!

by myxstorie



Category: Japanese Actor RPF, Johnny's Entertainment, KAT-TUN (Band), NewS (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Hospital, Hospitals, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2009-11-24
Updated: 2009-11-24
Packaged: 2018-02-10 00:21:15
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,697
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2003643
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/myxstorie/pseuds/myxstorie
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>For P-suke, who is in a lot of pain right now ._. I started this last Tuesday in my notebook while she was in surgery, spawned from a conversation we had while we were hanging about waiting for them to come along in their white coats and take her away, and have only just finished it now. It was meant to be short.... This is totally gratuitous, but I won't apologise for it :D Lots of thanks to Amy & Dacchan for helping when I was stumped, and Britt for reading (the majority of) it through for me ♥</p>
            </blockquote>





	Aizawa-sensei, Tasukete!

-

Yamapi doesn't like hospitals. They're big and white and full of sick people, and not places he likes to spend extended lengths of time. If he had a choice, he'd much rather prop himself up at home to heal, but that wouldn't be fair on his mother. He had the money to be here, anyway, so here was where he was.

Right now, here was a lumpy hospital bed, in a room with three other identical ones. Next to him is an elderly man with a cast from his thigh down to his ankle. In the far corner is a middle-aged woman, asleep, who seems fine to look at, but Yamapi supposes she must be there for a reason, unless the hospital have started renting out beds for sleeping.

Opposite him, there's one empty bed. It’s been empty since the day he arrived. At least, until that morning. Yamapi doesn’t hear the new patient being brought in - he always was told he sleeps like the dead – but when he wakes up, the last bed has been filled. The occupant is sleeping, just a tuft of fluffy brown hair visible amongst the pillows and blankets, and Yamapi and his neighbour decide that they must be foreign – or at least have a little foreign blood in them, to have hair like that. It looks so soft that Yamapi wants to run his fingers through it, wants to pet it and feel it against his cheek.

He hopes it’s a girl.

Later in the day, Yamapi nods off again – spending all his time in bed is tiring work – and when he stirs a few hours later, the newcomer is awake.

It’s not a girl.

He’s sat upright, and as Yamapi props himself up, he finds the other man’s eyes on him, unabashedly staring.

So, as is obviously the logical thing to do in such a situation, Yamapi stares right back. The other person, however, doesn’t look away as he’d expected. If anything, he stares harder, and Yamapi can _feel_ the challenge in his gaze. Never one to back down, he quirks his lips in silent acceptance, and fixes his eyes firmly on the dark brown ones opposite.

He doesn’t know how long they manage to stay like that, but too soon, his eyes start to burn, and it only gets worse until he can’t bear to keep them open any longer. He blinks, relief flooding his system, and when he opens his eyes again, the other patient’s all but screeching with happiness, triumph shining all over his face and in his wide smile.

Yamapi can’t help but smile in return; the grin on the other man’s face is infectious, and he feels the smile alone making his chest fill with warmth. His brain is telling him he should be feeling uncomfortable – he’s never met this person before, knows absolutely nothing about him, and already Yamapi feels like he’s known him all his life.

“Good afternoon, lazy.”

Yamapi’s eyes widen, and he bites his lip to stop himself laughing. Who does this guy think he is?

“Hello.”

“I’m Jin.”

“That’s nice,” Yamapi replies, smiling to take the edge off of his sarcasm.

Jin frowns, brow creasing, and he waits for a moment, just watching. When Yamapi doesn’t elaborate, he purses his lips.

“You know, when someone introduces themself, it’s polite to do the same.”

Yamapi’s soft smile widens, “Really? I see.”

There’s another long pause, before Jin speaks again, “Aren’t you going to tell me your name?”

“Nope,” Yamapi grins.

“Why?”

“Because.”

“Because isn’t a reason!”

“Yes it is. I just used it.”

“No it’s not!”

“Yes, it is.”

“It’s not!”

“It is.”

“It’s not~!”

“It tota-“

The nurse laughing stops Yamapi in his retort, “Did I just walk into the children’s ward?”

Yamapi blushes, ducking his head, and Jin pouts, folding his arms across his chest with a heavy sigh.

“I don’t like this room. It’s a rude room. I want to be moved.”

The nurse chuckles softly as she goes about checking Yamapi’s blood pressure, “I’m sorry, Akanishi-san, we’re very full at the moment. You’ll just have to stay here for now and make friends with the room.”

Yamapi didn’t think it was possible, but Jin’s pout deepens, and he seems to sink a little lower in his bed. The nurse looks across to him, then back at Yamapi, and smiles, eyes sparkling with mischief.

“Well,” she says, and Yamapi thinks she’s talking a little louder than necessary as she unhooks him from the machine and fills in the chart hanging from the bottom of his bed, “Everything seems to be just fine for now. A doctor will be in to see you shortly, Yamashita-san.”

Yamapi’s about to thank her when the penny drops, and Jin is mere moments behind, crowing gleefully.

The nurse just winks at him and grins before turning on her heel and leaving them to it.

-

“So, what are you here for?”

Yamapi looks up from his iPod, and pulls out his earphones, “Hmm?”

“What are you in for?”

He doesn’t bother to answer, instead pointing to his right arm, which is in plaster from the middle of his upper arm down to the hand, and the brace that covers one shoulder and wraps around his neck.

Jin gives him a Look, “Yes, I can see that. What did you _do_ to yourself, genius.”

“... I broke me.”

“Fuck, it’s like getting blood from a stone, this!” Jin huffs, sticking his tongue in his cheek, “ _How_ did you break it?”

Yamapi smirks to himself, unable to remember the last time he’d enjoyed winding someone up so much.

When he finally gives in to Jin’s whining, the other man is shocked into silence when he finds out Yamapi fell out of a helicopter. He’s less impressed when he learns it was only six feet off the ground at the time, but when Yamapi tells him _why_ he was in a helicopter six feet off of the ground in the first place, the awed sparkle is back.

“So you’re like, an actor?

Yamapi blushes and looks down at his blanket, ready for the onslaught of questions he’s grown accustomed to when people realise who he is, what he does for a living, “... Yeah.”

“Oh,” Jin says simply, “That’s cool. Is it fun to ride in a helicopter?”

Yamapi doesn’t even try to hide his wide smile as he launches into just how _awesome_ it is to fly in something so tiny, and by the end of the night, Jin’s managed to make him promise to take him up to Helicopter Sky too someday.

-

It’s a few days later when Yamapi realises he hadn’t asked Jin why _he_ was in the hospital.

There doesn’t appear to be anything wrong with him on the outside that Yamapi can see, but when he gets up, he walks with crutches.

“What happened to your leg?” He asks when Jin’s curtains are pulled back and his doctor has left. Yamapi probably could have listened in and figured it out, but he’d much rather learn from Jin himself.

“It’s infected,” Jin tells him lightly, without half the worry in his voice that Yamapi thinks there should be for an infection that’s bad enough to hospitalise him, “Something down there thinks I’m pretty tasty.” He winks obscenely, and Yamapi can’t stop himself laughing.

“What sort of infection?”

Jin shrugs, “Dunno.”

A beat.

“... What do you mean, you don’t know? Haven’t they told you?”

“They tried. I don’t want to know.”

Yamapi's incredulousness must show on his face, because Jin shrugs again, "They'll either fix me or they won't. If they can't, I don't want to know what I'm going to die of."

In some way, that makes a twisted kind of sense.

-

“What is _with_ this food?”

Yamapi looks up from his plate, mouth full, and raises his eyebrows in silent question – his mother always told him to swallow before he spoke.

“How can you eat that stuff? It’s so gross!”

Chewing and swallowing, Yamapi shrugs, “It tastes pretty good to me.”

Jin pulls a face that’s half disgusted and half baffled. He looks between Yamapi’s fork and his face, then does it again, looking no less disbelieving.

“I bet you ate that grey stuff they tried to feed us the other day too, didn’t you?”

“The stew? It was good!”

“It tasted like someone had eaten it already!”

“... But there was chicken.”

“That was _chicken_?”

“If the food is not satisfactory,” a third, no-nonsense voice chimes in, “You’re more than welcome to starve, Akanishi-san.”

Jin shrinks back into his pillows, bottom lip sticking out as he stabs at the suspicious looking brown lump on his plate and brings it to his mouth, before answering with as much contempt as he can cram into two words, “Yes, _sensei_.”

Yamapi likes Ueda-sensei. He might be a little moody at times, but he’s straightforward and doesn’t beat around the bush, and he’s got a really nice face. Too nice for someone stuck in a hospital all day, Yamapi thinks – he could make it big with a face like that. But Ueda seems happy here, and is normally found with – Yamapi looks around, and sure enough, there he is in the doorway – Kamenashi-sensei on his tail. Kamenashi-sensei is apparently younger, but doesn’t look it. He has gentle eyes with deep circles surrounding them, flyaway strands of hair breaking loose of his ponytail, and his smile is always pleasant, but tired. Jin is adamant that he doesn’t like Kamenashi – doesn’t like his stupid hair and his stupid nose and his stupid stethoscope (Yamapi hasn’t tried asking why Kamenashi’s stethoscope is so different to Ueda’s) – but he has a sneaking suspicion Jin is lying with the way his eyes always dart around eagerly when Ueda draws near.

Ueda flips through Jin’s chart, and proceeds to go through the same questions he’s heard them ask Jin since the first day he’d arrived - _Any nausea, headaches, can you feel your toes, can you move your toes_ and so on – before scribbling something down and replacing the chart, and leaving the nurse to take his blood pressure. Again.

Kamenashi follows dutifully behind him, and Yamapi watches Jin watch the nurse watch them leave. As she turns back to him, he sees Jin’s by now familiar smirk settle in place, eyelids drooping ever-so-slightly as he turns his ‘smoulder’ on her. Inwardly, Yamapi scoffs, but if he’s being honest, all Jin’s need for attention does is make him that little bit more endearing, in Yamapi’s eyes, at least.

The nurse herself seems rather fond of the look he’s giving her, and slides a hand through her hair as she turns away, the move accentuating her chest. Jin sends him a look, eyes dancing with amusement, and it settles something in his chest to know that Jin’s just playing around.

They always did tell him he got attached to people too easily.

-

Yamapi likes exploring the hospital, but he's never been down here before. Every few days, Jin will leave their ward, and be gone for the whole day - and when he returns, he always refuses to tell Yamapi where he's been.

Yamapi has contacts, though, and young Tegoshi, one of the medical students, has taken a firm liking to him. He's less fond of Jin, and has no problem telling Yamapi where he goes.

"Yatta!"

"Stop it!"

"Yeah, come on! Woohoo!"

A gasp, "You're such a cheat!"

"Am not!"

"I _lost_!"

"That's 'cause you suck!"

"You little brat!"

"Hah!"

Yamapi pokes his head around the door to find Jin propped up with his bad leg on a bean bag, surrounded by a multitude of brightly coloured toys and cushions, crayons and scribbled pictures, books and comfortable-looking blankets. Sitting next to him, game controller in hand, is a boy who can't be any older than six or seven, with a triumphant look on his face.

Jin doesn't look quite so pleased.

"So this is where you've been hiding. I knew you were lying when you said you were older than me."

Jin jumps, head whipping around to see Yamapi in the doorway, and sniffs, sticking his nose in the air like he doesn't care that he's been found out.

He can't fool Yamapi though, not with the flush on his cheeks.

"It's better company than I get in the ward. Toshi-kun here's a cheater, though."

"I didn't cheat!"

"Oh shut up, we both know you totally did." Jin's smiling though, and the kid sticks his tongue out, pushing Jin's good leg in retaliation.

Yamapi can't help but smile at the exchange, especially when Toshi curls up on one of the beanbags, and Jin shifts so that the kid can rest his head on his stomach.

He's so busy watching the little boy fall asleep that he almost forgets Jin's there. When he looks up, Yamapi thinks his heart is going to fly out of his chest, because Jin is looking down at the boy with a soft smile and eyes that shine with such delight that he realises it's probably not the video games that brings Jin down here so often.

-

Yamapi can't remember the last time he's felt like this. Whenever he sees Jin's smile, he feels like he's fifteen again, filled with the kind of childish innocence captured on Jin’s face whenever something makes him laugh.

And Jin laughs a lot. Most of the time, it’s at Yamapi’s expense.

Right now, he’s watching Yamapi struggle to wheel himself down the corridor with only one good arm, cackling joyfully from the other end when all Yamapi ends up doing is turning around in circles. Some race this was turning out to be.

“Lean more to the right! No, idiot, your other right! Come on, Pi, put your back into it!”

_Pi._

He’s not sure when Jin started shortening his name, but by the time he’d noticed, Jin had already been using it too long for Yamapi to ask him to stop. He’s pretty sure Jin would stop if he asked, but he also knows that the other man would probably make up a whole new, hideously embarrassing nickname for him, which he would take great pleasure in using as often as possible, in the most obnoxiously loud voice he could muster.

Besides, when Jin calls him ‘Pi’, Yamapi feels different. He isn’t the family name he feels like whenever he leaves the house and hears a group of giggling girls, or when he’s at home and sees himself on the television, or hears his voice on the radio. With Jin, he’s just ‘Pi’, a normal guy with a normal friend – as normal as Jin can be, anyway – with no strings attached.

With a grin and a determined nod, he tries again, pushing forwards and leaning heavily to the side... only to go careening into the nurse’s desk.

‘Pi’ can stay, but the way Jin is killing himself laughing can definitely go.

-

“I played a doctor once,” Yamapi says thoughtfully, after Ueda-sensei has left them to their dinner. He’s sitting in the chair next to Jin’s bed, stealing food from his plate; it’s not like Jin ever eats it anyway. He just pushes it around with his fork for a while, then flashes one of the nurses his Kicked Puppy Look – which always works best on Koyama-just-call-me-Kei-san – or _that_ look, the one with the quirking lips and heavy eyelashes that Yamapi might not be so wonderfully immune to himself, until one of them breaks and brings him something more to his liking. So far, it’s only been food.

“A doctor, huh?” Jin grins and waggles his eyebrows, “Sounds kinky.”

Yamapi laughs and throws a pea at him – he knows Jin won’t retaliate. They’d been scolded once already for using their dinner as weaponry, and Jin doesn’t like it when the pretty nurses get angry with him.

"No, idiot," Yamapi laughs, "In a drama."

"Oh. So do you understand all those little numbers and stuff they keep writing down?"

Yamapi looks.

"... No."

"Then you are of no use to me." Jin tosses his head, "You can take yourself and your fraud doctor and leave the _real_ doctors to look after me and my leg. You'd make me chop it off!"

Yamapi would have let it go, but something like horror flashes through Jin's eyes, and that's all Yamapi needs to see, heart sinking underneath the sickening feeling of betrayal.

"You... You _knew_."

Yamapi swallows hard around the lump in his throat, the words sticking painfully, and can't look Jin in the eyes.

"Pi, I'm sorry, I-"

"You _knew_ who I was, and you never said a word."

"Pi, please-"

"You made out you had no idea. I thought we were friends, Jin! Why would you _lie_ to me?!" He only realises he's raising his voice when the other patients glance over at him, clearly shocked that he's being anything but his normally softly-spoken self.

Lifting his eyes from his hands, which have curled into fists so tight they've turned white, Yamapi sees Jin's eyes shining with tears, and immediately deflates.

Jin pulls his lips in on themselves, and Yamapi can almost feel how badly the other man wants to be able to get up and come to him. As if on cue, Jin shuffles around and grabs for his crutches, starting to hoist himself out of bed, but one of the crutches falls to the floor with a clatter. Jin looks at it forlornly for a moment before trying again, with only one crutch, and Yamapi takes pity on him, making it to Jin's side before the other has even gotten his legs out.

Jin looks at him with those watery eyes, and Yamapi can't be angry, can't even be a little bit hurt, not when Jin looks so totally broken.

"I never lied to you, Pi," he says softly, voice shaky and barely-there, "I... They were watching TV in the lounge and you were in the show so I wanted to watch to see what it was like and it was really good so I watched some more and then there was that guy and the photo and you had to-"

He doesn't get any further, because Yamapi's flung his good arm around Jin's neck in a hug so strong it's more like a choke-hold.

Jin's own arms wrap gingerly around his waist, and Yamapi only lifts his face out of Jin's neck long enough to murmur a gruff, "Stupid," that makes Jin smile wide enough for him to feel it against his cheek.

It’s only when he’s hoping they never argue again that Yamapi realises that eventually, one of them is going to heal first. One of them is going to leave.

-

"Why aren't you in a private room?" Jin asks one day, “Someone like you’s gotta have the money for it.”

"I get lonely," Yamapi tells him, and he nods like he understands.

There’s silence for a moment, before Jin looks up at him and smiles.

“... I’m glad you’re in here.”

Yamapi refuses to admit that the reason he doesn’t answer is because he can barely swallow around the lump in his throat.

-

The day Yamapi’s been dreading comes far sooner than he hopes.

Two days before, they take the brace off of his neck, and only replace the cast on his forearm, telling him cheerfully that so long as his blood pressure stays constant, he can go home.

Even years of drama school and coaching and movies hasn’t given him enough acting experience to be able to force a smile for them.

He doesn’t know how to tell Jin. He doesn’t _want_ to tell Jin.

In the end, he _doesn’t_ tell Jin.

Yamapi stays up late the night before, waiting patiently for Jin to fall asleep. He knows the moment it happens, even if Jin always snuggles down as best he can and closes his eyes. His body slumps a little heavier, head slipping down against his shoulder, and he lets out a long, soft breath that Yamapi can’t hear from his bed. A little part of him wishes he could.

When he’s positive Jin’s sleeping, he packs his things, and in the morning, before Jin wakes up, Yamapi goes to find the nurse, instead of waiting for her to come to him.

He’s gone before Jin so much as stirs.

-

On the outside, his friends tease him, poke fun and grin about how he must have met a girl in the hospital – maybe a hot nurse – because he’s constantly drifting off, staring into space as they talk to him, and they joke about how he’s suffering from a broken heart.

It doesn’t feel quite as funny to him.

Not a day goes by when he doesn’t think of Jin, doesn’t wonder what he’s doing, how his leg is healing. It feels like a million times a day that he sees something, hears something, and thinks he just _has_ to tell Jin, turning around or reaching for his cellphone before he realises Jin’s not _there_ anymore, and the only A on his contact list is his manager.

He feels like he’s breaking a little more every time.

Each day is getting harder and harder to get through. The hours seem longer, the work seems harder, and Yamapi just feels exhausted no matter how much he sleeps. The physiotherapy is grueling and incredibly painful, and more often than not he just wants to curl up and die after an hour of trying to use muscles that have all but given up on him after so long. He regrets giving in to the management's insistence that he have the best physiotherapist he can get - although he's grateful that they're doing their best for him, there's always the little nagging voice in the back of his mind telling him that if he'd just put his foot down again, if he hadn't felt so bad for being so stubborn about not having his own room, then they would have let him go back to the hospital for his physio. Back to Jin.

Instead, he's stuck here with a useless arm, and despite being surrounded by friends and family and colleagues damn near 24/7, Yamapi's never felt so alone.

-

He lasts three weeks.

Three weeks of pain and frustration and unanswered prayers, wishes and hopes and what-ifs filling his thoughts more often than actual life.

In the beginning, he hadn't wanted to upset Jin by telling him he had to leave. He'd been too cowardly to want to face those big, brown eyes filled with sadness, and despite how egotistical it makes him feel, Yamapi can't deny it. Then, once he'd gone, he been too scared to return and face Jin's anger. His foreign blood - Italian, Yamapi had learned - had given him a foul temper, and when Jin gets angry, he doesn't care who knows it.

After a week, Yamapi started to wonder. Would Jin even care? What if he'd looked into their friendship too much? What if Jin was that friendly with everyone? What if Jin didn't _want_ to see him again? What if there's a new patient in his bed, smiling and laughing and teasing Jin the way he had?

By the end of the second week, Yamapi's convinced himself to let go. Jin was so full of life and love and happiness, he wouldn't care to have someone as overworked as Yamapi in his life. Their friendship was simply down to similar circumstances, being forced together for such a long time that they either forged bonds together or killed each other.

They'd be nothing outside of that place. The minute real life came into play, they'd realise they were totally different people who just didn't belong together, and that knowledge would break them apart.

He'd rather remember the smiles they had than suffer drifting apart.

-

Sunday night, the last day of the third week, Yamapi dreams.

It doesn't happen often, his mind too busy during the day to have the energy to work at night, and when he does, he rarely remembers it.

This time, he wakes up just as dawn is breaking, images of grass and sunlight and Jin still swimming through his head, laughter ringing in his ears, and in that moment between sleep and wakefulness, Yamapi realises something.

It doesn't matter if they're different people outside. It doesn't matter if they have different lives, different dreams, and it doesn't matter if they don't make it.

What matters is that they try.

-

He's up, showered and dressed before the sun has fully risen, and he spends far too long sitting, standing, tapping his foot, channel-hopping and pacing back and forth to keep a regular person sane, so, just before seven, Yamapi leaves.

He arrives at the hospital before official visiting hours, but he’s not going to let something like silly rules stop him now – and a tiny part of him knows that if he stops, if he waits, he’s going to chicken out.

Yamapi doesn’t run unless instructed, but he’s barely keeping his pace down to a brisk stride now that he’s actually _there_ , walking the same halls, breathing the same stale, slightly rank air as Jin. The ward feels further than he remembers, but that only makes him walk faster, eager to get there and see Jin’s face again.

Only, when he does, Jin’s not there.

The bed is empty.

All the way here, Yamapi hadn’t even stopped to think that it had been _three weeks_. Jin had probably checked out by now, gone on his way, and now he’d never be able to find him.

The bed opposite is filled with a young man, who is sound asleep. The woman in the corner has gone, her bed empty and bare, but the old man opposite is still there, and he sends Yamapi a nod and a smile.

“Looking for your friend?”

“I... Yeah, but I guess he-“

“He’ll be right back,” he winks, “I think he went to chat up that nurse he seemed so fond of.”

The relief that floods Yamapi’s body turns his knees to jelly, and it must show on his face because the old man’s grin widens, turning gummy at the corners, and he nods towards Jin’s empty bed.

“Stick around some. He’s been a right grouch since you escaped, it’s driving us up the wall. Even the new guy tried to be nice, and got glared at. Maybe you can snap him out of it.”

Yamapi won’t admit it out loud, but it makes his heart soar to think that maybe, just maybe, Jin’s missed him too.

He flops down on Jin’s bed, with every intention of staying awake to greet him when he returns, but his lack of sleep, the mass of blankets Jin insists on hogging, the still-warm pillow underneath his cheek, and more than anything else, the scent of Jin still lingering on the pillows sends Yamapi drifting off into a peaceful doze.

When he wakes, it’s to a tickling sensation against his ear, and he half-jumps, half-shudders his way upright, batting sleepily in the direction of the disturbance with his healthy arm.

Jin’s laughter has never been more melodic.

“Rise and shine, Sleeping Beauty.”

Jin’s voice has never been more uplifting.

Rubbing his eyes, Yamapi grins back, and Jin shoves him to the side so that he can climb underneath the covers too.

Jin’s smile has never been so soft. His skin has never been so warm, his eyes so bright, his face so beautiful.

As he’s manhandled back down onto the pillows and finds Jin’s nose in his neck, Yamapi feels a leg – the good one – nudging against his own and twisting around it as Jin snuggles closer. Jin’s breath is soft on his skin, and as it evens out, Yamapi finally gets to feel that gentle sigh ghosting across his jaw.

Jin has never been more breathtaking than he is right now.

As Yamapi rests his cheek on Jin’s head and curls his arm tightly around Jin’s shoulders, he decides that he’d gladly let Jin steal his breath until he suffocates, so long as he never lets go again.


End file.
